I have two posts that i want to write. One about college. One about other stuff. But now i dont want to write either because when i'm not around friends i kinda get depressed. Bleh.
So I might have to decide between SDSU and UCSB. Let't think about this.
SDSU:
- San Diego
- Close to family
- Small campus
- Small classes
- Sunny
- Beach like 15 mins away (by car)
- Mexico
- Possible car privileges
- Journalism
- Nice campus
- Nice dorms
- No wheels campus (bikes, boards...)
- Nobody I know is going
- Hot girls
- I'm afraid that the people will be fake or even just too Socal
- Sunburns
- No (mens) track team
UCSB:
- Santa Barbara
- Closer to home
- Big campus
- Big classes
- Communications (but not Journalism)
- Beach like 2 mins away (by foot)
- Variations in weather
- Nice campus
- NIce dorms
- Bike paths (Big bike school)
- Lauren and Cailin are going at least (other people too, i guess)
- The people will definately be cool
- Hot girls
- Track team
- What if i change my mind about my major?
Oh well. If UCSB doesn't accept my appeal. My decision is made. But if not. Well... Eh... I hate this.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
I Missed You
We watched a movie in Newhouse today about venomous animals. They were trying to 'milk' this deadly spider of its venom, but there was a problem. Question: How do you catch a deadly spider? Answer: Pay an Austrailian. Question: How the fuck do you milk a deadly spider? Answer: Piss it off. Question: How? Answer: Blow on it. Question: Why does every animal on God's green earth hate when humans blow in their face? Answer But Kind Of A Question: Do you like dog/cat/deadly spider breath?
I guess nothing likes human breath. When I blow in Riley's face he scrunches his eyes up. The cat, LuLu, does that, too. Then she hisses and runs away. And the deadly spider? He rears up and bares his fangs, extremely irritated and so ready to strike that his fangs are dripping with lethal venom. I didn't think my breath was that bad, I mean, I brush twice a day.
But then again, we think animals have bad breath. Ever hear of "dog breath"? That's a pretty bad rap. Ever smell a cat's breath? They eat fish and nasty cat food. And I don't think I ever want to get close enough to a deadly spider that I could smell it's breath. But I guess it's a fair trade off.
It brings up a couple questions though. Do animals like each other's breath? What about animals that don't breathe, like fish? Do they get annoyed when other fish blow bubbles in their face? Do hummingbirds have bad breath? All they eat is nectar, and that's delicious. It's really too bad that I'm not going to think about these. It's not really too bad that i won't, it's actually too bad that i'm to lazy to care.
MORAL: Don't get close enough to smell a deadly spider's breath and don't blow in it's face if you don't want to die horribly.
PS: I'm happy to report that my man shield is holding at a hearty 80%. Even today's episode of Scrubs couldn't touch me, in both senses of the word.
PS PLUS!: The couples in the new safter VW Jetta commercials. The driver and his date were black (but in the we're black, but in the whitest way possible), but the white guy in back had an asian gf (and not the i'm asian in the whitest way possible). The trend has been growing faster and faster. Now we just need more of Sati's parents types on TV.
I posted. Happy, Connie?
I guess nothing likes human breath. When I blow in Riley's face he scrunches his eyes up. The cat, LuLu, does that, too. Then she hisses and runs away. And the deadly spider? He rears up and bares his fangs, extremely irritated and so ready to strike that his fangs are dripping with lethal venom. I didn't think my breath was that bad, I mean, I brush twice a day.
But then again, we think animals have bad breath. Ever hear of "dog breath"? That's a pretty bad rap. Ever smell a cat's breath? They eat fish and nasty cat food. And I don't think I ever want to get close enough to a deadly spider that I could smell it's breath. But I guess it's a fair trade off.
It brings up a couple questions though. Do animals like each other's breath? What about animals that don't breathe, like fish? Do they get annoyed when other fish blow bubbles in their face? Do hummingbirds have bad breath? All they eat is nectar, and that's delicious. It's really too bad that I'm not going to think about these. It's not really too bad that i won't, it's actually too bad that i'm to lazy to care.
MORAL: Don't get close enough to smell a deadly spider's breath and don't blow in it's face if you don't want to die horribly.
PS: I'm happy to report that my man shield is holding at a hearty 80%. Even today's episode of Scrubs couldn't touch me, in both senses of the word.
PS PLUS!: The couples in the new safter VW Jetta commercials. The driver and his date were black (but in the we're black, but in the whitest way possible), but the white guy in back had an asian gf (and not the i'm asian in the whitest way possible). The trend has been growing faster and faster. Now we just need more of Sati's parents types on TV.
I posted. Happy, Connie?
Saturday, April 08, 2006
WONDERSHOWZEN!
5 JOKES IN 5 SECONDS!!!
1!!
Q: What do you call a leopard named billy who just fell down a 600 foot ravine into a squirming pit of dead ducks covered in leprosy once owned by a Pizzeria?
A: In this case-- you would refer to the unfortunate soul as "Bad Luck Billy"!!!
2!!
Q: What would someone like you end up with if, say, for the sake of argument (or more accurately-- for the sake of this particular joke), that you were a scientist working in the field of experimental bio-engineering, and you made an erstwhile effort to genetically cross JFK with KFC?
A: All of our best data indicates unequivocally that you would get John Fitzgerald Chicken.
3!!
A Mountaineer who just returned from scaling Mount Kilamanjaro walks into a bar and asks for a free drink. The bartender, sensing an ominous chill in the air says, "well sir, I can't give you a free drink, but i can give you five jokes in five seconds." "Shoot" replied the crest fallen mountain man. It was at this time in the joke that the admittedly jumpy barkeep pulled out his pistol and beat the mountaineer to death in five easy blows.
4!!!
It seems there was this elephant who decided to get a part-time job at a bakery* to save up to buy a toilet. When he showed up to the interview the manager asked the elephant what qualifications he had to work a part time job. As the elephant passionately laid out his extensive retail and patisserie experience, the mangaer interrupted him curtly exlaiming, "Wait-- if you buy a toilet, and flush your business--- what will the poor dung beetles eat?" Just then the elephant straightened his tie and tossed this beauty of a zinger orally into the ether: "They shall eat your finest croissants," the elephant intoned, "And doubtless that they shan't taste the diff."
*you should know that htis particular bakery is known for the unusual poor quality of its croissants
5!!
The Pope, a bear, a rabbi, a pirate, a diplomat, a midget, a woman in a coma, a pelican, and your mom were all relaxing on an Eames chair after a furious fortnight of group hate sex when there was a sound at the door. "Knock-knock" went the sound emanating from the door.
Simultaneously, and without missing a beat, an answer broke like a desperate yowl from the throats of the orgiers: "Who's there?"
Like a shot from the butt gun of a pre-radicalized 1920's anarchist came a response from beyond the door. "Bananana."
Faster than a duck could rape a lizard in the mouth, our motley crew of freakazoids, safely ensconced in the luzury of their designer seatlery, shook their heads and bleated as a unit, "Orange you glad we've already heard this joke and so shan't be participating (unless of course you are offering substantial financial remuneration.)" There was no reply from the other side of the door, save this: One absolute rascal of a fart.
Awesome. Thanks Gus.
1!!
Q: What do you call a leopard named billy who just fell down a 600 foot ravine into a squirming pit of dead ducks covered in leprosy once owned by a Pizzeria?
A: In this case-- you would refer to the unfortunate soul as "Bad Luck Billy"!!!
2!!
Q: What would someone like you end up with if, say, for the sake of argument (or more accurately-- for the sake of this particular joke), that you were a scientist working in the field of experimental bio-engineering, and you made an erstwhile effort to genetically cross JFK with KFC?
A: All of our best data indicates unequivocally that you would get John Fitzgerald Chicken.
3!!
A Mountaineer who just returned from scaling Mount Kilamanjaro walks into a bar and asks for a free drink. The bartender, sensing an ominous chill in the air says, "well sir, I can't give you a free drink, but i can give you five jokes in five seconds." "Shoot" replied the crest fallen mountain man. It was at this time in the joke that the admittedly jumpy barkeep pulled out his pistol and beat the mountaineer to death in five easy blows.
4!!!
It seems there was this elephant who decided to get a part-time job at a bakery* to save up to buy a toilet. When he showed up to the interview the manager asked the elephant what qualifications he had to work a part time job. As the elephant passionately laid out his extensive retail and patisserie experience, the mangaer interrupted him curtly exlaiming, "Wait-- if you buy a toilet, and flush your business--- what will the poor dung beetles eat?" Just then the elephant straightened his tie and tossed this beauty of a zinger orally into the ether: "They shall eat your finest croissants," the elephant intoned, "And doubtless that they shan't taste the diff."
*you should know that htis particular bakery is known for the unusual poor quality of its croissants
5!!
The Pope, a bear, a rabbi, a pirate, a diplomat, a midget, a woman in a coma, a pelican, and your mom were all relaxing on an Eames chair after a furious fortnight of group hate sex when there was a sound at the door. "Knock-knock" went the sound emanating from the door.
Simultaneously, and without missing a beat, an answer broke like a desperate yowl from the throats of the orgiers: "Who's there?"
Like a shot from the butt gun of a pre-radicalized 1920's anarchist came a response from beyond the door. "Bananana."
Faster than a duck could rape a lizard in the mouth, our motley crew of freakazoids, safely ensconced in the luzury of their designer seatlery, shook their heads and bleated as a unit, "Orange you glad we've already heard this joke and so shan't be participating (unless of course you are offering substantial financial remuneration.)" There was no reply from the other side of the door, save this: One absolute rascal of a fart.
Awesome. Thanks Gus.
Friday, April 07, 2006
SLKDJG
PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTY
PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTY
FUCKING PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTY!
PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTY
FUCKING PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTY!
Thursday, April 06, 2006
CSI Psychic
I'm back on top. I feel so good. Finally back to my regular speed. I gotta kick butt this year. I'm hoping for the 800 and the mile. But if Gus and Phil dont get faster I might have to run the mile and the two mile. That would BITEBITEBITE. But we'll see, eh? My legs hurt and will kill me tomorrow. I have two cankersores and i'm getting two wisdom teeth out tomorrow. I have to go to SD for like 6 days over break and that bites, so I'm going to see if i can go to the meet and just take the bus down later. That would be so slgsjdgl cool. Booyah Jim Gaffigan tomorrow. Uhoh.
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Jesse Jackson
Wow. This is why everybody hates Christians. Goddamn bastards. Our only hope is that they get what's coming to them sooner, rather than later. It says at the bottom of the Pat Robertson article that he actually hired a guy to monitor his on-air craziness, but i guess it doesn't work.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jerry_Falwell
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pat_Robertson
When will people realize that religion is supposed to help, not to destroy and condemn? Fuckersfuckersfuckers.
Crimson Jihad on both their houses
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jerry_Falwell
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pat_Robertson
When will people realize that religion is supposed to help, not to destroy and condemn? Fuckersfuckersfuckers.
Crimson Jihad on both their houses
Monday, April 03, 2006
Juevos y Gaucho Pants
Note: I don't know how or why i am going to write this. I'm going to get a lot of flack for it, though. But since this is my good blog, i'll just do it.
If you know me, you probably know that sexuality doesn't bug me. I make straight jokes and gay jokes and i tend to play around as persons from both sides of that spectrum. I really dont mind grabbing a yoongi's ass or levi's ass. There are limits. I can't keep a straight face for too long, the joke goes too far, i'd never sleep with a man, etc. And lots of people joke around and say im gay or a woman(hopefully they're joking), but when you kid around, you gotta take things in stride.
But what happens when you catch yourself being feminine outside the joke? I'm constantly finding myself tempted to tear at a touching tale of tenderness. Movies, TV shows, even during cartoons. It feels like someone switched my steroid pills for estrogen pills (if you watched 'the longest yard' with us on friday, you'd laugh a bit maybe). Maybe I am finally becoming human. Yet again, maybe I'm turning into a pussy.
I used to act like a girl on the phone too. The only people that I'd ever talk to were Fiona, Yoongi, or Connie. And with Fi and Connie we'd only gossip or talk about feelings. Feelings... men aren't supposed to have feelings. Feelings are for ladies. But i have them. Other people have them too, i think. Too bad though.
I think maybe i just need to stop being such a pussy, both in the sense that i need to get manlier and in the sense that i need to stop whining about being such a pussy. I don't know. I'll just shut up.
If you know me, you probably know that sexuality doesn't bug me. I make straight jokes and gay jokes and i tend to play around as persons from both sides of that spectrum. I really dont mind grabbing a yoongi's ass or levi's ass. There are limits. I can't keep a straight face for too long, the joke goes too far, i'd never sleep with a man, etc. And lots of people joke around and say im gay or a woman(hopefully they're joking), but when you kid around, you gotta take things in stride.
But what happens when you catch yourself being feminine outside the joke? I'm constantly finding myself tempted to tear at a touching tale of tenderness. Movies, TV shows, even during cartoons. It feels like someone switched my steroid pills for estrogen pills (if you watched 'the longest yard' with us on friday, you'd laugh a bit maybe). Maybe I am finally becoming human. Yet again, maybe I'm turning into a pussy.
I used to act like a girl on the phone too. The only people that I'd ever talk to were Fiona, Yoongi, or Connie. And with Fi and Connie we'd only gossip or talk about feelings. Feelings... men aren't supposed to have feelings. Feelings are for ladies. But i have them. Other people have them too, i think. Too bad though.
I think maybe i just need to stop being such a pussy, both in the sense that i need to get manlier and in the sense that i need to stop whining about being such a pussy. I don't know. I'll just shut up.
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