Errbody

So Pat was out and about one day. Just doing the normal stuff. Rambling, talking, avoiding crappy cars, when all of a sudden it hit him. The Red Sox won the world series. Bush won the election. And he was getting his pansy ass kicked in his sport of choice. The world was coming to an end. He looked up into the sky and he saw it. Giant crows falling from the sky. Destroying everything in their path.

Pat ran to the supermarket. He looted all the canned goods and water and picked up a mad magazine to pass the time over his lifespan. He ran to the fallout shelter, conveniently located 45 stories below the earth's crust. He didnt bring anybody along because he figured that he'd get annoyed with them and probably eat them. So he sat and waited.

It had been almost 10 hours when Pat ran out of canned soup. He didnt like stealing so he only got 2 cans. He didnt know how long apocalypses usually lasted but he was sure it was over by now. He lifted the lid on his shelter and saw the destruction. There were survivors, but they were generally twitching and yelling on the ground, trapped under large pieces of concrete. He ignored their pathetic cries and turned to more pressing matters. Where were all the Froot Loops?

In his haste he forgot to secure the Froot Loops and had no clue where they were. He searched round and round until he found some in the ruins of the old mortuary. How appropriate. Cos Pat choked on a Froot Loop and all the dying people laughed when his lifeless body hit the floor.