New Years:
Resolutions:
1) Gym and running for a quarter. I know i'll go to the gym really frequently since its the end of break and im fat now, but i need to continue it for a long time is the thing. at least 10 weeks for christs sake.
2) Pass math, continue to do good in chem and physics. Mebbe better.
3) More time at library. It aint so bad.
4) Learn to surf. I have a wetsuit now. Gotta use it.
5) Go to the east coast.
6) Not come home all of spring break.
7) Costa Rica by spring 09.
8) Get a job. Cool one? Hopefully. But i need steady money.
9) Kick that snotnosed motherfucker's ass. Yea. That guy who ripped up our flag and started shit. It's on.
10) Stop pretending like things are sunny. I smack talk too much to be so cordial to people. I want to get comfortable with actively and gracefully not caring when someone walks in the room.
11) What do you think? Tell meh summin.
Omgomgomg. Concerning number 6, I really just dont want to go home at all this year. Spring break. Then summer school. Then thxgiving. Then winter break. My parents are really starting to annoy me. Starting? Sorry, fulfilled their mission to annoy me. My mom asks me if im hungry like every 4 seconds. It would be funny or cute if it wasnt every day 40 times a day and if she didnt always end the convo with 'i guess you changed'. No mom. Sometimes i will have coffee if i feel like it. Sometimes i will eat breakfast if i feel like it. Sometimes i dont like it when you ask me stupid questions. Sometimes i dont like when you do stupid things in public or in front of my friends. Get over it. And then dad. Constantly hostile. Never friendly. I realized that I dont actually know who he is. I mean. He's my dad and he's a dick. But thats now. He used to be a real person. With emotions and friends and stories. He does tell stories. But only benign ones. He doesnt tell me anything that offers real insight into who he was. And i know he has those stories because i've tried to talk to him about them. I mean, his right hand has been crippled from birth. Thats a big deal. But he never, ever talks to me about it. Okay, fine. Sore subject. But im his son. I should be able to have a convo with my dad about something so influential in his life. but i just get yelled at. Fuck him. I dont want to come back to this house for spring break. I dont want to come back in the summer. I dont want to come back for thanksgiving. I dont want to come back for next winter break. I want a year off from my family. Is that asking alot? maybe. I'll probably get a little homesick. But for serial, i need them off my back.
happy new year
Monday, December 31, 2007
Monday, December 03, 2007
Oh Yea
I also don't like freshmen. It's not that i dont like freshmen, really, it's more that I just changed my major and now i share a whole fuckload of classes with smartass punks who just got out of apchem and apcalc. Today, I hate that kid in my chemlab. You know, one of those kids who needs to show you how smart and able he is every time he talks to you. Every lab he has to talk about how he did all of this in highschool because he had the hardest teacher ever and now chem is hella easy for everybody. "I mean, we haven't even discussed multiple equilibria *snort*" Shut the fuck up, kid. I hate chemistry. Im going to get this class over as soon as i fucking can and i might end up shoving my fist up your nose. And then today really set me off. "I want to be a (insert chem career here) so when i get out of grad school i'll make 150k right off the bat. Unless of course i was a (insert another chem career here) then i'd probably make, yknow, 125k - 180k. I'll have to decide soon. But i guess it doesnt really matter anyway. I'm in this frat, see, called AEPi and when i do important things in my life I'll be really well connected and be really successful in life." I understand the concept of being well connected because you're from a frat. I'm not even bothered by it too much. And cmon, levi's in aepi, i dont have a problem with frats. they provide attention, beer, and mistake sex to iv's uggos and sluts. and again, the bragging isn't too hard to handle on a weekly basis, but who the fuck is bragging about 8 years in the future? what does this kid have to prove to the class? maybe he wanted to impress my ta. whatever. nick's chill, it's not hard to do.
agh. point is, i hate the kid.
agh. point is, i hate the kid.
Fuckin Retards
i really dont like stupid people. but we all do so i'll skip that part. i was thinking more along the lines of telling people that they're stupid. it's pretty hard. and it makes you angry. all this is summed up by their only response. 'im not stupid!'
it's pretty hard to counter that when you're making your point to the stupid person in question. rather than tell you what they did that day that required any brain power, they just assert that they are 'not stupid'. they dont even have to be book stupid, and when you're in college, it's generally not they case. more often than not, they can be common sense stupid, or linguistically stupid, or socially stupid or whatever. these are hard to prove because you end up trying to reenact a situation or encounter when it really was a 'you had to be there' moment.
and there's more. even if you successfully show the person that they are stupid and you present clear and valid arguments, you still have to get past the defense mechanisms set up by the human brain. it's difficult for someone to believe they're stupid because that would go against instinct. most people know that the only reason that humans survived is because humans are smart. so what happens to a dumb human? it dies. people dont want to consider themselves as potential deadguys. that would be depressing. if the lesson stuck, they would be broken human beings reading dontkillyourself books (if they are literate) and continue shuffling silently through their lives until they die. and then you look at yourself and realize that you just broke somebody and what do you do then, douchebag?
i've decided that convincing people they're stupid doesnt really work. and even if it did, you'd be a douchebag. bumconclusion, but homework awaits.
(hey also, fuck you guys. conclusions are for essays to reiterate your points and bring up new questions to be answered or possible areas of research. did you read the rest of my fucking blog? can you wait until the next time i talk about stupid people to answer any retarded points you might want to bring up? make your own fucking conclusion, you fucking dicks)
it's pretty hard to counter that when you're making your point to the stupid person in question. rather than tell you what they did that day that required any brain power, they just assert that they are 'not stupid'. they dont even have to be book stupid, and when you're in college, it's generally not they case. more often than not, they can be common sense stupid, or linguistically stupid, or socially stupid or whatever. these are hard to prove because you end up trying to reenact a situation or encounter when it really was a 'you had to be there' moment.
and there's more. even if you successfully show the person that they are stupid and you present clear and valid arguments, you still have to get past the defense mechanisms set up by the human brain. it's difficult for someone to believe they're stupid because that would go against instinct. most people know that the only reason that humans survived is because humans are smart. so what happens to a dumb human? it dies. people dont want to consider themselves as potential deadguys. that would be depressing. if the lesson stuck, they would be broken human beings reading dontkillyourself books (if they are literate) and continue shuffling silently through their lives until they die. and then you look at yourself and realize that you just broke somebody and what do you do then, douchebag?
i've decided that convincing people they're stupid doesnt really work. and even if it did, you'd be a douchebag. bumconclusion, but homework awaits.
(hey also, fuck you guys. conclusions are for essays to reiterate your points and bring up new questions to be answered or possible areas of research. did you read the rest of my fucking blog? can you wait until the next time i talk about stupid people to answer any retarded points you might want to bring up? make your own fucking conclusion, you fucking dicks)
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Chem Sucks, But I Never Had To Miss THE BIGGEST SOCCER GAME OF THE SEASON Like Physics Is Making Me Do
Starbucks
Girl on Cell Phone - Yea, so my dad came down to post bail for my boyfriend. Huh? 15,000 dollars. Yea i know!
Library
Girl on Cell Phone - I NEED TO MAKE A COMPARISON BETWEEN THE DARK STORIES AND THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA! YOU DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND!
girls on cell phones are weird.
Girl on Cell Phone - Yea, so my dad came down to post bail for my boyfriend. Huh? 15,000 dollars. Yea i know!
Library
Girl on Cell Phone - I NEED TO MAKE A COMPARISON BETWEEN THE DARK STORIES AND THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA! YOU DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND!
girls on cell phones are weird.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Sorry Guys, I Owe You, Huh?
I promised a new post earlier, and it's probably not going to be done in this sitting, so I'm taking a shortcut and copy pasting this with tasteful edits to make the transition from facebook to blog alot easier. Or something.
"sooo. i met erica last year, she was like right around the corner from me in the dorms. i liked her cos she was really cool and we liked all the same stuff. when i say that i mean we're comic and cartoon fanatics, we love the same shows like futurama (we're both hardcore fans) and basic interests like playing for playing's sake. and she plays frisbee and rockclimbs and hikes and atvs and does all this cool outdoors stuff. and really i started seeing her at the end of last year but the thing was that she was really really quiet and i wasnt sure if i was too interested in that. i felt she only smiled and laughed politely and stuff, but i couldnt really see alot of other emotion. and this happened when we were alone, too, so that really sucked. we never actually made it official tho and i think that was part of the problem. we couldnt, really, because summer was like 2 months away and that would be kinda silly. she never totally loosened up around me because of that and it kinda annoyed me. and so when i came back to sb i ended things. i still really liked her, it was just that i thought that this was a big thing that could get in the way and just make me unhappy. so i made a bold decision and tried to stick with it. i never told her why because honestly, i thought she would ask, but she didnt. she just assumed that i wanted to be free and party and hook up with girls all the time (which is, admittedly super fun, but this is superer fun). so it was a little awkward, but we remained good friends (not amazing friends, i couldnt really talk to her about stuff because stuff was about her). there was a little incident where she got tipsy and ended up hooking up with my old roommate. she immediately regretted it, it was just that she doesnt drink alot and our jungle juice is deceptively potent, so it was just a bad deal. also, neel never told me he had feelings for erica even tho he knew i still liked her. he also didnt talk to me about it afterwards even though he knew it was super weird. i eventually got really angry at him because he was hanging out with her so much without clearing these things up with me. it felt more like he was sneaking around, rather than pursuing a love interest. i had a long talk with neel and now we're super good, so thats all in the past. but yea. needless to say, i already missed her, but now i was super insanely jealous, so i started thinking about her romantically again. so i told myself that i had to say something because i was going to go nuts. and i ended up telling her everything, and she was really surprised that there actually was a reason behind it and she was a little upset that i didnt actually bring it up to her or tell her what was wrong. after all that, we decided to try it again. and we were really tentative at first, because we didnt want it to not work and then feel bad, but even after like 2 days, we just felt the magic and shit and its been really fuckin cool. i told her that i intend on making this longterm (and to prove it i made it facebook official *gasp*), and i guess she's more comfortable with that because now she talks to me all the time and she's really silly now and its like everything i was annoyed at is gone and its just the cool stuff thats left. now we talk about everything, from what happened during the day or the crazy little things i think about or just feelings. i feel the last two convo topics need some explanation because they really matter the most to me. firstly, when i say that we talk about little crazy things i think about, i mean that everybody has some weird thoughts or beliefs or gut feelings that are too silly or inane to actually put into words. but these things really interest me and nobody seems to understand as well as erica does. like first try. its tight. secondly, im making it a point to tell erica everything that i feel about her at almost any given moment. i think this helps alot because it makes her smile when i tell her something about why i like her at that particular moment. it's also a way of not taking her for granted like i did last time. but yea. it was a long time without her, and we were both really upset about it for a long time, but now we're back together and things are so much better than last year. its great. she lives just down the block from me in sb and she's from sacramento, so we can take daytrips to see eachother. i know theres something that im leaving out, but i forgot what it was.
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end quote. but yea. it's sick. you dont even know. for instance, we were talking about cool songs, and i said that i already know what song is going to play at my wedding and it was going to be hella hardcore. i didnt really know what song i had in mind, i was going to make a split second decision and think of a random awesome song and then say that. but nothing came to mind except for the jurassic park theme song. DUHNUHNUH NUH NUH DUHNUHNUH NUH NUH! i didnt mean too, i was trying to think of an offspring or foo fighters song. but sure enough, erica goes 'the jurassic park song?' i was blown away. i didnt even know i was going to think of that song. she just kinda knows me. its really cool like that. (by the way, i would totally marry a fat woman and have her come down the aisle on all fours while that song was playing and then there would be a hotdog on a string above her head at the altar and then she'd stand up like the first time dr grant sees the brontosaurus, and then she'd grab it with her teeth and rip it off the line and the music would come to a crescendo right when she crashes back down on her hands and knees. and then she'd trumpet in triumph. BRUHHHH.) but yea. awesomesauce.
also, im failing math and i need to study for other classes. and in addition to that, i need to start working out again. in fact, im going to go to the bathroom, change, and the go to the gym. siiick stuff. hope you guys are doing well.
"sooo. i met erica last year, she was like right around the corner from me in the dorms. i liked her cos she was really cool and we liked all the same stuff. when i say that i mean we're comic and cartoon fanatics, we love the same shows like futurama (we're both hardcore fans) and basic interests like playing for playing's sake. and she plays frisbee and rockclimbs and hikes and atvs and does all this cool outdoors stuff. and really i started seeing her at the end of last year but the thing was that she was really really quiet and i wasnt sure if i was too interested in that. i felt she only smiled and laughed politely and stuff, but i couldnt really see alot of other emotion. and this happened when we were alone, too, so that really sucked. we never actually made it official tho and i think that was part of the problem. we couldnt, really, because summer was like 2 months away and that would be kinda silly. she never totally loosened up around me because of that and it kinda annoyed me. and so when i came back to sb i ended things. i still really liked her, it was just that i thought that this was a big thing that could get in the way and just make me unhappy. so i made a bold decision and tried to stick with it. i never told her why because honestly, i thought she would ask, but she didnt. she just assumed that i wanted to be free and party and hook up with girls all the time (which is, admittedly super fun, but this is superer fun). so it was a little awkward, but we remained good friends (not amazing friends, i couldnt really talk to her about stuff because stuff was about her). there was a little incident where she got tipsy and ended up hooking up with my old roommate. she immediately regretted it, it was just that she doesnt drink alot and our jungle juice is deceptively potent, so it was just a bad deal. also, neel never told me he had feelings for erica even tho he knew i still liked her. he also didnt talk to me about it afterwards even though he knew it was super weird. i eventually got really angry at him because he was hanging out with her so much without clearing these things up with me. it felt more like he was sneaking around, rather than pursuing a love interest. i had a long talk with neel and now we're super good, so thats all in the past. but yea. needless to say, i already missed her, but now i was super insanely jealous, so i started thinking about her romantically again. so i told myself that i had to say something because i was going to go nuts. and i ended up telling her everything, and she was really surprised that there actually was a reason behind it and she was a little upset that i didnt actually bring it up to her or tell her what was wrong. after all that, we decided to try it again. and we were really tentative at first, because we didnt want it to not work and then feel bad, but even after like 2 days, we just felt the magic and shit and its been really fuckin cool. i told her that i intend on making this longterm (and to prove it i made it facebook official *gasp*), and i guess she's more comfortable with that because now she talks to me all the time and she's really silly now and its like everything i was annoyed at is gone and its just the cool stuff thats left. now we talk about everything, from what happened during the day or the crazy little things i think about or just feelings. i feel the last two convo topics need some explanation because they really matter the most to me. firstly, when i say that we talk about little crazy things i think about, i mean that everybody has some weird thoughts or beliefs or gut feelings that are too silly or inane to actually put into words. but these things really interest me and nobody seems to understand as well as erica does. like first try. its tight. secondly, im making it a point to tell erica everything that i feel about her at almost any given moment. i think this helps alot because it makes her smile when i tell her something about why i like her at that particular moment. it's also a way of not taking her for granted like i did last time. but yea. it was a long time without her, and we were both really upset about it for a long time, but now we're back together and things are so much better than last year. its great. she lives just down the block from me in sb and she's from sacramento, so we can take daytrips to see eachother. i know theres something that im leaving out, but i forgot what it was.
end quote. but yea. it's sick. you dont even know. for instance, we were talking about cool songs, and i said that i already know what song is going to play at my wedding and it was going to be hella hardcore. i didnt really know what song i had in mind, i was going to make a split second decision and think of a random awesome song and then say that. but nothing came to mind except for the jurassic park theme song. DUHNUHNUH NUH NUH DUHNUHNUH NUH NUH! i didnt mean too, i was trying to think of an offspring or foo fighters song. but sure enough, erica goes 'the jurassic park song?' i was blown away. i didnt even know i was going to think of that song. she just kinda knows me. its really cool like that. (by the way, i would totally marry a fat woman and have her come down the aisle on all fours while that song was playing and then there would be a hotdog on a string above her head at the altar and then she'd stand up like the first time dr grant sees the brontosaurus, and then she'd grab it with her teeth and rip it off the line and the music would come to a crescendo right when she crashes back down on her hands and knees. and then she'd trumpet in triumph. BRUHHHH.) but yea. awesomesauce.
also, im failing math and i need to study for other classes. and in addition to that, i need to start working out again. in fact, im going to go to the bathroom, change, and the go to the gym. siiick stuff. hope you guys are doing well.
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