That's right. Once a week. I can't wait.
Fucking hate lj. I want a fucking facebook.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Now I Just Feel Silly
I feel silly. I just want to go out and play all day. Please. No more school. No more math. No more spanish. No more getting up early. No more essays. No more disney channel. No more competitive running. And no more friggin lj. All I'll have is my car and my girl and my friends. A concert or two and then:
That's right. Once a week. I can't wait.
Fucking hate lj. I want a fucking facebook.
That's right. Once a week. I can't wait.
Fucking hate lj. I want a fucking facebook.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
The Wedding Singer vs. Pocahontas
I have two posts that i want to write. One about college. One about other stuff. But now i dont want to write either because when i'm not around friends i kinda get depressed. Bleh.
So I might have to decide between SDSU and UCSB. Let't think about this.
SDSU:
- San Diego
- Close to family
- Small campus
- Small classes
- Sunny
- Beach like 15 mins away (by car)
- Mexico
- Possible car privileges
- Journalism
- Nice campus
- Nice dorms
- No wheels campus (bikes, boards...)
- Nobody I know is going
- Hot girls
- I'm afraid that the people will be fake or even just too Socal
- Sunburns
- No (mens) track team
UCSB:
- Santa Barbara
- Closer to home
- Big campus
- Big classes
- Communications (but not Journalism)
- Beach like 2 mins away (by foot)
- Variations in weather
- Nice campus
- NIce dorms
- Bike paths (Big bike school)
- Lauren and Cailin are going at least (other people too, i guess)
- The people will definately be cool
- Hot girls
- Track team
- What if i change my mind about my major?
Oh well. If UCSB doesn't accept my appeal. My decision is made. But if not. Well... Eh... I hate this.
So I might have to decide between SDSU and UCSB. Let't think about this.
SDSU:
- San Diego
- Close to family
- Small campus
- Small classes
- Sunny
- Beach like 15 mins away (by car)
- Mexico
- Possible car privileges
- Journalism
- Nice campus
- Nice dorms
- No wheels campus (bikes, boards...)
- Nobody I know is going
- Hot girls
- I'm afraid that the people will be fake or even just too Socal
- Sunburns
- No (mens) track team
UCSB:
- Santa Barbara
- Closer to home
- Big campus
- Big classes
- Communications (but not Journalism)
- Beach like 2 mins away (by foot)
- Variations in weather
- Nice campus
- NIce dorms
- Bike paths (Big bike school)
- Lauren and Cailin are going at least (other people too, i guess)
- The people will definately be cool
- Hot girls
- Track team
- What if i change my mind about my major?
Oh well. If UCSB doesn't accept my appeal. My decision is made. But if not. Well... Eh... I hate this.
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
I Missed You
We watched a movie in Newhouse today about venomous animals. They were trying to 'milk' this deadly spider of its venom, but there was a problem. Question: How do you catch a deadly spider? Answer: Pay an Austrailian. Question: How the fuck do you milk a deadly spider? Answer: Piss it off. Question: How? Answer: Blow on it. Question: Why does every animal on God's green earth hate when humans blow in their face? Answer But Kind Of A Question: Do you like dog/cat/deadly spider breath?
I guess nothing likes human breath. When I blow in Riley's face he scrunches his eyes up. The cat, LuLu, does that, too. Then she hisses and runs away. And the deadly spider? He rears up and bares his fangs, extremely irritated and so ready to strike that his fangs are dripping with lethal venom. I didn't think my breath was that bad, I mean, I brush twice a day.
But then again, we think animals have bad breath. Ever hear of "dog breath"? That's a pretty bad rap. Ever smell a cat's breath? They eat fish and nasty cat food. And I don't think I ever want to get close enough to a deadly spider that I could smell it's breath. But I guess it's a fair trade off.
It brings up a couple questions though. Do animals like each other's breath? What about animals that don't breathe, like fish? Do they get annoyed when other fish blow bubbles in their face? Do hummingbirds have bad breath? All they eat is nectar, and that's delicious. It's really too bad that I'm not going to think about these. It's not really too bad that i won't, it's actually too bad that i'm to lazy to care.
MORAL: Don't get close enough to smell a deadly spider's breath and don't blow in it's face if you don't want to die horribly.
PS: I'm happy to report that my man shield is holding at a hearty 80%. Even today's episode of Scrubs couldn't touch me, in both senses of the word.
PS PLUS!: The couples in the new safter VW Jetta commercials. The driver and his date were black (but in the we're black, but in the whitest way possible), but the white guy in back had an asian gf (and not the i'm asian in the whitest way possible). The trend has been growing faster and faster. Now we just need more of Sati's parents types on TV.
I posted. Happy, Connie?
I guess nothing likes human breath. When I blow in Riley's face he scrunches his eyes up. The cat, LuLu, does that, too. Then she hisses and runs away. And the deadly spider? He rears up and bares his fangs, extremely irritated and so ready to strike that his fangs are dripping with lethal venom. I didn't think my breath was that bad, I mean, I brush twice a day.
But then again, we think animals have bad breath. Ever hear of "dog breath"? That's a pretty bad rap. Ever smell a cat's breath? They eat fish and nasty cat food. And I don't think I ever want to get close enough to a deadly spider that I could smell it's breath. But I guess it's a fair trade off.
It brings up a couple questions though. Do animals like each other's breath? What about animals that don't breathe, like fish? Do they get annoyed when other fish blow bubbles in their face? Do hummingbirds have bad breath? All they eat is nectar, and that's delicious. It's really too bad that I'm not going to think about these. It's not really too bad that i won't, it's actually too bad that i'm to lazy to care.
MORAL: Don't get close enough to smell a deadly spider's breath and don't blow in it's face if you don't want to die horribly.
PS: I'm happy to report that my man shield is holding at a hearty 80%. Even today's episode of Scrubs couldn't touch me, in both senses of the word.
PS PLUS!: The couples in the new safter VW Jetta commercials. The driver and his date were black (but in the we're black, but in the whitest way possible), but the white guy in back had an asian gf (and not the i'm asian in the whitest way possible). The trend has been growing faster and faster. Now we just need more of Sati's parents types on TV.
I posted. Happy, Connie?
Saturday, April 08, 2006
WONDERSHOWZEN!
5 JOKES IN 5 SECONDS!!!
1!!
Q: What do you call a leopard named billy who just fell down a 600 foot ravine into a squirming pit of dead ducks covered in leprosy once owned by a Pizzeria?
A: In this case-- you would refer to the unfortunate soul as "Bad Luck Billy"!!!
2!!
Q: What would someone like you end up with if, say, for the sake of argument (or more accurately-- for the sake of this particular joke), that you were a scientist working in the field of experimental bio-engineering, and you made an erstwhile effort to genetically cross JFK with KFC?
A: All of our best data indicates unequivocally that you would get John Fitzgerald Chicken.
3!!
A Mountaineer who just returned from scaling Mount Kilamanjaro walks into a bar and asks for a free drink. The bartender, sensing an ominous chill in the air says, "well sir, I can't give you a free drink, but i can give you five jokes in five seconds." "Shoot" replied the crest fallen mountain man. It was at this time in the joke that the admittedly jumpy barkeep pulled out his pistol and beat the mountaineer to death in five easy blows.
4!!!
It seems there was this elephant who decided to get a part-time job at a bakery* to save up to buy a toilet. When he showed up to the interview the manager asked the elephant what qualifications he had to work a part time job. As the elephant passionately laid out his extensive retail and patisserie experience, the mangaer interrupted him curtly exlaiming, "Wait-- if you buy a toilet, and flush your business--- what will the poor dung beetles eat?" Just then the elephant straightened his tie and tossed this beauty of a zinger orally into the ether: "They shall eat your finest croissants," the elephant intoned, "And doubtless that they shan't taste the diff."
*you should know that htis particular bakery is known for the unusual poor quality of its croissants
5!!
The Pope, a bear, a rabbi, a pirate, a diplomat, a midget, a woman in a coma, a pelican, and your mom were all relaxing on an Eames chair after a furious fortnight of group hate sex when there was a sound at the door. "Knock-knock" went the sound emanating from the door.
Simultaneously, and without missing a beat, an answer broke like a desperate yowl from the throats of the orgiers: "Who's there?"
Like a shot from the butt gun of a pre-radicalized 1920's anarchist came a response from beyond the door. "Bananana."
Faster than a duck could rape a lizard in the mouth, our motley crew of freakazoids, safely ensconced in the luzury of their designer seatlery, shook their heads and bleated as a unit, "Orange you glad we've already heard this joke and so shan't be participating (unless of course you are offering substantial financial remuneration.)" There was no reply from the other side of the door, save this: One absolute rascal of a fart.
Awesome. Thanks Gus.
1!!
Q: What do you call a leopard named billy who just fell down a 600 foot ravine into a squirming pit of dead ducks covered in leprosy once owned by a Pizzeria?
A: In this case-- you would refer to the unfortunate soul as "Bad Luck Billy"!!!
2!!
Q: What would someone like you end up with if, say, for the sake of argument (or more accurately-- for the sake of this particular joke), that you were a scientist working in the field of experimental bio-engineering, and you made an erstwhile effort to genetically cross JFK with KFC?
A: All of our best data indicates unequivocally that you would get John Fitzgerald Chicken.
3!!
A Mountaineer who just returned from scaling Mount Kilamanjaro walks into a bar and asks for a free drink. The bartender, sensing an ominous chill in the air says, "well sir, I can't give you a free drink, but i can give you five jokes in five seconds." "Shoot" replied the crest fallen mountain man. It was at this time in the joke that the admittedly jumpy barkeep pulled out his pistol and beat the mountaineer to death in five easy blows.
4!!!
It seems there was this elephant who decided to get a part-time job at a bakery* to save up to buy a toilet. When he showed up to the interview the manager asked the elephant what qualifications he had to work a part time job. As the elephant passionately laid out his extensive retail and patisserie experience, the mangaer interrupted him curtly exlaiming, "Wait-- if you buy a toilet, and flush your business--- what will the poor dung beetles eat?" Just then the elephant straightened his tie and tossed this beauty of a zinger orally into the ether: "They shall eat your finest croissants," the elephant intoned, "And doubtless that they shan't taste the diff."
*you should know that htis particular bakery is known for the unusual poor quality of its croissants
5!!
The Pope, a bear, a rabbi, a pirate, a diplomat, a midget, a woman in a coma, a pelican, and your mom were all relaxing on an Eames chair after a furious fortnight of group hate sex when there was a sound at the door. "Knock-knock" went the sound emanating from the door.
Simultaneously, and without missing a beat, an answer broke like a desperate yowl from the throats of the orgiers: "Who's there?"
Like a shot from the butt gun of a pre-radicalized 1920's anarchist came a response from beyond the door. "Bananana."
Faster than a duck could rape a lizard in the mouth, our motley crew of freakazoids, safely ensconced in the luzury of their designer seatlery, shook their heads and bleated as a unit, "Orange you glad we've already heard this joke and so shan't be participating (unless of course you are offering substantial financial remuneration.)" There was no reply from the other side of the door, save this: One absolute rascal of a fart.
Awesome. Thanks Gus.
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